Jake's input on why he doesn't want to go to school

When I lay down with Jake at night or during the day for an occasional nap, that is when he pours out what he is thinking to me. Well, yesterday he needed a nap so we were laying down and he started in on why he doesn't want to go to school.

He feels that the other kids "correct him all the time" and tell him to "listen and obey."

He feels that the other kids "play mean on the playground and push him down and growl at him."

He feels the teachers "correct him all the time too." When asked which teachers, he names all 3 kindergarten teachers.

He feels that the other kids take toys and books and keep them from him and won't let him play with them.

Do I think all of this is accurate? No. I do not think that he is getting pushed down and ganged up on. I see the little boys playing tag on the playground a lot and it tends to get rough. He wants to play tag, but he wants to be tagged not have his coat pulled on. I think he is having some confusion of intentions here. I do see him being corrected by his peers and teachers a lot and I can talk to the teachers and nip that in the bud to some extent. I do not think that the other kids are taking toys and books and keeping them from him. I think that either a) they were playing with them first and he has gotten in his mind that he wants them NOW or b) they are off limits and not supposed to be played with and the other kids are trying to enforce the rules. Kindergartners are very good rule monitors! LOL!

So, after this discussion with Jake and a couple of sad hearts on the part of Craig and I, and another discussion of homeschooling, here's what our plan is....

1. He will return to school on Monday

2. I will take him out of school for lunch and second recess a couple of times a week and bring him home for an hour to relax provided we don't have a fit about returning for the last 2 1/2 hrs.

3. I will have lunch with him on Tuesdays and/or Thursdays provided we don't have a fit about me having to leave after lunch. I have to go across the parking lot to pick up Lydia from preschool at 11:30 anyway and that is right after Jake's lunch.

4. I will be up there on Wednesdays to volunteer in his class anyway.

5. I will talk to his teacher about taming one particular child who likes to point out all of Jake's shortcomings to me and Jake every time I walk in the room. He's been driving me nut-so for a while anyway about this but I tried a few approaches on my own and last time we were at school they weren't working.

6. I will talk to his teacher about not giving me the "low down" when I pick Jake up from school. I think this bothers him b/c he knows she is telling me all about his day.

7. I will ask her not to call him back to her table to review his mistakes on his classwork. He RARELY makes an academic mistake but she corrects his handwriting a lot with her red pen. She calls the children back once or twice a week to review their errors with them. I'm going to ask that she stop and tell her I will take care of it at home. (Which I won't b/c his handwriting is very good and IMO she needs to ease off!) If I see a trend in academic mistakes I will surely review this with him but I can count on two hands the number of academic mistakes I've seen on his bazillion worksheets this year.

We'll start there. We'll see how my presence at lunchtime goes. He'll have to make a deal of no tears about me leaving in order for me to continue. Craig can do Fridays most of the time. I don't mind going up there for a bit if that is what it takes to ease his anxiety. I want him to learn that his school is a fun, safe, loving environment and I think it really strives to be. I think he has some misperceptions b/c of his difficulty reading social situations. Therefore he feels attacked. Craig and I loved learning, just adored education. Still love to learn new stuff. We want the same for our kids. We don't want Jake to hate school. It is a wonderful little school.